Tuesday, August 4, 2009

I have no excuse.

My suckage is magnified. I miss you all. I really do.

My Google Reader was just opened (since March) and I felt like I was home.

Facebook has taken over. Life has taken over. Time refuses to stand still for me.

But I just read a post from my dear friend Margaret that prompted me to say. I miss you all...

Who know's if anyone will ever realize that I posted something? I hope some of you do. If not.

Just know I am still here...Still breathing, sometimes hyperventilating.

My daughter starts Kindergarten in September. And I am going back to work the exact same day as her. I am dreading this new phase in our lives. I have so much guilt and regret for certain things this past year and I feel unable to change things at this point. So work it is. For now.

So. I will need a venting place. This will be it. I hope you are all still along for the ride. I would hate it if you weren't.

Yesterday was my 8th wedding anniversary. And there are some days that I can't believe we are still married then there are most other times when I realize I really can't live without him. How have I fallen so hard? I dunno. But I am grateful for his presence.

Summer is almost over. I have so much to do for the fall. School supplies for her have been purchased. For me, not so much. I am stalling. I don't want to go back.

I lie. I would like to want to go back. I am looking forward to the company of adults and using my brain again. I miss teaching.

But I am afraid I'll be missing so much of my little girl's first school year. I can't let that happen. Any suggestions? Help.

Well, off to swim class now, then a playdate. I am truly busy. But you are all on my mind. Daily.

9 comments:

  1. Welcome back! Great to see you!

    You'll both be fine with school. Try to enjoy it!

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  2. You'll do great! Remember to breathe... and take it one day at a time.. that's all we can do. You'll find your stride.. and when you do, please let me know how you did it because my Sugarplum starts next year.

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  3. Welcome back. We're here for you even if you (and by that I mean ME) don't always post on your (and by that I mean MY) blog.

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  4. I'm still here!

    I'm in the same boat as you...going back in 2 weeks. But I don't want to. No even a little bit. I want to be at home but can't, so that sucks. But my kids will be perfectly fine and are SO excited so I guess in the big picture I shouldn't really worry and just enjoy the paycheck, right?

    I'm here for ya! Are you at the same school as her?

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  5. Yay, it's you!!!! Yes, Facebook has sucked me in too. I think I've posted 5 times all summer. I posted today, very similar to yours. The Queen starts kindergarten TOMORROW. I'm not ready either. She is SO excited. DeBoy is terribly upset that he can't go too.

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  6. I'm always here! Facebook has taken over a lot for me, too. And life. I thought it was just me. I've been trying to hang in there, but I fall short most days.

    I am sorry you're going back to work if you don't really want to. I am hoping you can find your groove & that it won't be so bad.

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  7. I was just thinking about you the other day, wondering how you are and hoping that you're ok. I've missed you too!

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  8. Welcome back... :) To be honest when I saw your blog highlighted I had to start reading to remember which one you were... whoops!
    I take it you're a teacher and going back to work now that your child is old enough to be in school too...
    That's my plan eventually so I'll be interested to see how it goes for you!

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