Mom of the Year...Not

 

So Janet awarded me with this hysterical, well, award. I love it. I love it for many reasons. The title, the image...the fact that I am SO NOT "Mom of the year"! Thank you Janet. I will wear this proudly.

So, here’s what you do:

1. Admit that ONE thing you feel awful about involving being a mom. Get it off your shoulders. Once you’ve written it down, you are NO LONGER allowed to feel bad. It’s over with, it’s in the past. Remember, you’re a good mom!


2. To remind yourself that you ARE a good mom, list SEVEN things you love about your kids, you love doing with your kids, or that your kids love about you. These are the things to remind yourself of EVERY DAY that you rock!


3. Send this to FIVE other Moms of the Year that deserve forgiveness and a reminder that they, too, are the best moms they can be!!! Remember to send them a note to let them know you’ve selected them, and add a link to the person who nominated you!

Hell, I have one bajillion things that I can name that I have done and felt awful about later on. But here's one: I feel like I don't spend enough time with my daughter. Gah. There, I said it. I feel guilty when I'm on the phone, when I plop her in front of the TV or computer, when I send her to the basement to play alone...Whenever I am NOT doing something, anything with her...Hell, while I'm writing this post. But I do it anyway, because I still need some MOM time, even after she's been in school...or out with her Dad...or well, anything not here.

I'm sorry. I do it and I guilt myself...but I continue to do it.

A vicious circle. I tell you.

Okay. There. That's that.

Now, the seven things I love about my daughter:
1. Her imagination. She is vivid and specific and creative and so interesting to listen to when she's telling a story or playing out a situation with her toys. I love listening to her.

2. Her vocabulary. She sucks up new words every day. She speaks better than I do. And I love that about her.

3. Her love of life.  Every day is fresh and exciting and fun for her. She loves life and school and her friends and loves sharing her joy with everyone.

4. The fact that she used to be shy...and isn't any more. What a different kid. She was so painfully shy it hurt ME to watch her be outside. But now, she has more friends and more social events and more to give than anyone I ever met.

5. Her hair. Damn I love her hair. It's thick and long and luxurious and I'd give anything for a head of hair like hers.

6. Her heart. She cares. Truly cares about other people's feelings and making them happy. She wants everyone to feel loved and cared for. It's an amazing quality for a child to possess. And she HAS it 100%.

7. Her focus. She gets into something and stays in it until it is done. A game, a project, a book. Anything. Once she starts something, she must finish it. Especially when she is truly in love with whatever she's doing. I envy her focus. I envy her passion for things.

I want every mom who comes to this blog to accept this award from me. I think we are all too hard on ourselves and it's nice to know there are others out there who feel the way we do. If you do this..let me know so I can link to you here...

Haiku...are we still doing this? Friday

Oh, it's been so long
my head hurts from the distance
of Haiku Friday.

I'm very rusty
I've so much to say to you
not enough haiku

Two thousand and nine
has not started out nicely
Better? Maybe? Now?

Signs of spring are here
Signs of life, back at this blog
Hello happy spring!

Brushing off the cold
Brushing off the misery
New year started with

Looking forward to
better on the horizon
the rest of this year!

***

Go here or here for Mr.Linky (these 'kuers rock)...to add your own piece of artful writing.

To play along for Haiku Friday, follow these steps:

1. Write your own haiku on your blog. You can do one or many, all following a theme or just random. What’s a haiku, you ask? Click here.

2. Sign the Mister Linky at one of the above chickie's blogs with your name and the link to your haiku post (the specific post URL, not your generic blog URL). We will delete your link if it doesn’t go to a haiku. If you need help with this, contact Christina.

3. Pick up a Haiku Friday button to display on the post or in your sidebar by clicking the button above.

About A Mom. Me.

I totally snatched this from "Problem Girl".
I think this fits perfectly with my goal to maintain a journal for Fa....

1. What is something mom always says to you? You love me.

2. What makes mom happy? Me.

3. What makes mom sad? Not me.

4. How does your mom make you laugh? You make funny faces.

5. What was mom like as a child? Like me.

6. How old is your mom? 76

7. How tall is your mom? 60 feet

8. What is her favorite thing to do? Kiss me.

9. What does your mom do when you are not around? Lay on the couch.

10. If your mom becomes famous, what would it be for? Me.

11. What is your mom really good at? Punching the dog in the head.

12. What is your mom not very good at? Not punching the dog in the head.

13. What does your mom do for work? Nothing.

14. What is your mom's favorite food? Salad.

15. What makes you proud of your mom? You're mommy.

16. If your mom was a cartoon character, who would she be? I don't know.

17. What do you and your mom do together? Hug.

18. How are you and your mom alike? We both have brown hair.

19. How are you and your mom different? She has short hair and I have long hair.

20. How do you know your mom loves you? 'Cause I know.

21. What does your mom like most about your dad? He hugs her.

22. Where is your mom's favorite place to go? Home.

She's not a girl of many words this morning...I'm shocked.
Actually, this is quite accurate. Except! I am SO not 76. I feel 76, but I'm NOT 76.

Gimme a Break

Ya know, some people need re"ass"urance and some just know you're there.
Some people get mad when you don't call them every day and some just don't care.

Needy people piss me off. I have no time patience to be coddling you.
I wish I could do what you want, but I have more important things to do.

Don't take it personally when I don't call you right back.
Sometimes I just don't feel like talking, but I'll get back on track.

If you are disappointed by not hearing from me, I understand.
But don't be mad at me for not holding your hand.

I wish I could make you happy but that is not my job.
You need to do that for yourself don't make me feel like a slob.

This was initially a rant that I felt needed to be aired.
Turned into a poem, who knew I was so damn prepared.

:)
Consider this my St. Paddy's Day Limerick for ya.

The grass is always greener...

My daughter wishes so badly she was older. She is torn between still wanting things done for her yet wanting to be independent of me...I don't blame her.

I on the other hand, wish I was a kid again. I wish I was carefree, bill-free, worry-free, free to be. Watching her struggle with her independence only makes me feel sorry for her. She doesn't know yet what it's like to not be able to pay a bill, to worry about sickness and death. To wonder what steps you could have taken to make it turn out differently. And I can't tell her. She must learn all this for herself. THAT is hard for me to deal with.

She thinks I don't understand. Oh! But I do. I understand it well. I have been 5 years old. She has never been 37.

I have been to the place on my mother's lap where safety isn't just a thought, it's a constant. I know what it's like to be in kindergarten for the first time wondering what my mother was doing while I was away. I know of scraped knees and bruised egos.

She thinks I don't get it.

She wants to be a drumming veterinarian when she grows up. She will have a parrot in her waiting area and I will be answering the phones and calling the pets in at their turn. On the weekends, she will practice the drums for the pets she takes home to care for...I want those things for her too...

But, I know life's twists and turns may lead her in many directions before she settles on one thing focus. I watch her make decisions, I see her challenge herself many times a day. I know she is on her way to all that her dreams may lead her.

I wish I was there again. Not just with her, guiding her. But for myself. I wish the doors were opened in all directions letting the possibilities in from all sides. I wish I had some of it to do over again. I wish I had my mothers lap to sit on just one more time.

But I do have my daughter. I have her waiting to play 'Candy Land' with me. I have her watching as I sew the holes in her stuffed "patients". I have her comfortably on my lap, talking to me like she knows she can. Sharing the ups and downs of five. Wishing for a moment we were in each other's shoes, then stepping back and enjoying the right now. Because we'll never have this moment again.